I Will Not Be Bullied I Will Not Bully Others

One thing that Mom and Dad (Marie Zoutomou-Quintanilla and Jayson Quintanilla) want is a confident kid. We wanted to share our perspective on how to instill self-confidence into any child. Self-confidence is a critical part of life and influences areas such as education, career choice, self-fulfillment, relationships, and independent, critical thinking.

Bullying has long been tolerated as a rite of passage among children and adolescents. There is an implication that individuals who are bullied must have "asked for" this type of treatment, or deserved it. Sometimes, even the child who is bullied begins to internalize this idea. For many years, there has been a general acceptance and collective shrug when it comes to a child or adolescent with greater social capital or power pushing around a child perceived as subordinate. But bullying is not developmentally appropriate; it should not be considered a normal part of the typical social grouping that occurs throughout a child's life. Although bullying behavior endures through generations, the milieu is changing. Historically, bulling has occurred at school, the physical setting in which most of childhood is centered and the primary source for peer group formation. In recent years, however, the physical setting is not the only place bullying is occurring. Technology allows for an entirely new type of digital electronic aggression, cyberbullying, which takes place through chat rooms, instant messaging, social media, and other forms of digital electronic communication. Composition of peer groups, shifting demographics, changing societal norms, and modern technology are contextual factors that must be considered to understand and effectively react to bullying in the United States. Youth are embedded in multiple contexts and each of these contexts interacts with individual characteristics of youth in ways that either exacerbate or attenuate the association between these individual characteristics and bullying perpetration or victimization. Recognizing that bullying behavior is a major public health problem that demands the concerted and coordinated time and attention of parents, educators and school administrators, health care providers, policy makers, families, and others concerned with the care of children, this report evaluates the state of the science on biological and psychosocial consequences of peer victimization and the risk and protective factors that either increase or decrease peer victimization behavior and consequences.

From the authors of The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline, an indispensable guide to unlocking your child’s innate capacity for resilience, compassion, and creativity. When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. This is what New York Times bestselling authors Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson call a No Brain response. But our kids can be taught to approach life with openness and curiosity. When kids work from a Yes Brain, they’re more willing to take chances and explore. They’re more curious and imaginative. They’re better at relationships and handling adversity. In The Yes Brain, the authors give parents skills, scripts, and activities to bring kids of all ages into the beneficial “yes” state. You’ll learn • the four fundamentals of the Yes Brain—balance, resilience, insight, and empathy—and how to strengthen them • the key to knowing when kids need a gentle push out of a comfort zone vs. needing the “cushion” of safety and familiarity • strategies for navigating away from negative behavioral and emotional states (aggression and withdrawal) and expanding your child’s capacity for positivity The Yes Brain is an essential tool for nurturing positive potential and keeping your child’s inner spark glowing and growing strong. Praise for The Yes Brain “This unique and exciting book shows us how to help children embrace life with all of its challenges and thrive in the modern world. Integrating research from social development, clinical psychology, and neuroscience, it’s a veritable treasure chest of parenting insights and techniques.”—Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D., author of Mindset “I have never read a better, clearer explanation of the impact parenting can have on a child’s brain and personality.”—Michael Thompson, Ph.D. “Easily assimilated and informative, the book will help adults enable children to lead physically and emotionally satisfying and well-rounded lives filled with purpose and meaningful relationships. Edifying, easy-to-understand scientific research that shows the benefits that accrue when a child is encouraged to be inquisitive, spirited, and intrepid.”—Kirkus Reviews

Bullying at School is the definitive book on bullying/victim problems in school and on effective ways of counteracting and preventing such problems.

Why does your toddler get upset when his or her routine is disrupted? Why do they follow you from room to room and refuse to play on their own? Why are daily routines such as mealtimes, bath time, and bed time such a struggle? This accessible guide demystifies the difficult behaviors of anxious toddlers, offering tried-and-tested practical solutions to common parenting dilemmas. Each chapter begins with a real life example, clearly illustrating the behavior from the parent's and the toddler's perspective. Once the toddler's anxious behavior has been demystified and explained, new and effective parenting approaches are introduced to help parents tackle everyday difficulties and build up their child's resilience, independence, and coping mechanisms. Common difficulties with bath time, toileting, sleep, eating, transitions, social anxiety, separation anxiety, and sensory issues are solved, along with specific fears and phobias, and more extreme behaviors such as skin picking and hair pulling. A must-read for all parents of anxious toddlers, as well as for the professionals involved in supporting them.

When Shola Richards's soul-sucking job left him feeling numb and suicidal, he switched focus and devoted himself to transforming the workplace into a space of relentless respect, courtesy, and endless energy. Meant to motivate current and future leaders, Making Work Work aims to start a movement that will banish on-the-job bullying, put meaning back into work, and enhance coworkers' happiness and engagement.

A modern twist on the classic tale, Big Red and the Little Bitty Wolf demonstrates that sometimes an unexpected solution to being bullied can have surprising success. Big Red loves nothing more than tormenting Little Bitty Wolf. Little Bitty tries everything to get Big Red to stop bothering him, but nothing works—until the school counselor gives him a good idea. This book can be used to spark a discussion with kids about bullying and show them that it is important to seek help. Includes a “Note to Parents and Caregivers.”

Youth author, speaker, and teen life strategist Gibbs provides a solid framework to help bring an end to bullying through a seven-step strategy to start a movement of kindness and compassion on school campuses.

Sometimes kids use hurtful or ugly words to put down other kids, whether they mean to insult or are just going along with the group. These hurtful words often carry a deeper meaning that many children aren’t aware of. Ouch Moments shows kids who is affected by these words: the target, the mean kid, and bystanders. Includes a “Note to Parents and Caregivers.”

I think most of us have been bullied at one time in our life or another. I believe there were times we may not have realize we were being bullied! If we were not being hit or yelled at we were not being bullied. Not true! Have you ever had something gnaw away at you in the pit of your stomach and you did not know what it was? I have. Have you ever been left out of a conversation not only when you were young but now as adults? It hurts and is so uncomfortable. Have you ever been laughed at and to you for no reason at all? Have you ever had people just look down at you? Have you ever had people make you feel worthless without having to say anything? Has anyone ever teased you until it hurt? Yes, these are all forms of bullying. Have you ever yelled at your children and I don’t mean just normal mom and dad discipline? Have you said things you should not have and did not realize it was emotional abuse to your children? The things that I have heard parents say are stupid and shut up. That is just a couple things. Think about it and then apologize to your children – no matter how old or young they are! Just love them! If any of the above sounds familiar, you are a bully! That is right! Re-read the bad feelings above and if you have done that to anyone you know, well maybe you need to tell them just how sorry you are! This goes for bosses also! Being a boss does not give you the right to be a bully! If you think you will get a better employee that way you are so wrong!