Dont Call Me Grandma

A granddaughter recounts the reasons why her grandmother is hard to love--and why she loves her anyway.

To most people, the very word grandma conjures up images of old, blue-haired women in a flower-print apron and wearing sensible shoes in the kitchen, baking cookies. But times have changed. In her book Don't Call Me Grandma! A Guide for the 21st-Century Grandmother, author Ilene Leventhal dispels the stereotype of the so-called typical grandmother. Today's grandmother is so much more. They are socially active and even text and e-mail. They bring a whole new definition of cool, proving once and for all that some things never go out of style. Don't Call Me Grandma! is a handbook for the new generation of grandmothers, as well as mothers and even mothers-in-law. Blue hair has been traded for younger cuts, our baking for trips for fun fast food, and the flower-print aprons for tennis skirts, matching tops, and cute boots. Don't Call Me Grandma! A Guide for the 21st-Century Grandmother shows how to break out of that "old" image, and still bake cookies if you want. You can become someone who knows how to relate to her grandchildren. Your grandchildren will never think of you simply as "grandma" ever again.

Don't Call Me Grandma! probes the little-known underworld of my life as a grandma - the fearsome challenge against time that makes choking seem delightful. Do people assume you don't have sex anymore? Has babysitting become the supreme fear in your life, surpassing demonic possession? Were you ever assaulted by a baby biscuit? These are a few fearful situations that I have endured as the result of my agonizing transition from normalcy to the geriatric nightmare of becoming a grandma. Don't Call Me Grandma! also delves into the trauma of getting older. The ""golden"" years are not golden. The title, Senior Citizen, holds no rank. Wrinkles WILL find you. Allow me to bring some light-hearted laughter to your busy day through Don't Call Me Grandma! - a satirical but humorous revelation depicting every hidden aspect of what happened to me when I was hit with the double whammy of getting older and becoming a grandma.

Perfect for fans of Jennifer E. Smith and Huntley Fitzpatrick, Don't Call Me Baby is a sharply observed and charming story about mothers and daughters, best friends and first crushes, and our online selves and the truth you can only see in real life. All her life, Imogene has been known as the girl on that blog. Imogene's mother has been writing an incredibly embarrassing, and incredibly popular, blog about her since before she was born. The thing is, Imogene is fifteen now, and her mother is still blogging about her. In gruesome detail. When a mandatory school project compels Imogene to start her own blog, Imogene is reluctant to expose even more of her life online . . . until she realizes that the project is the opportunity she's been waiting for to define herself for the first time.

A great gift and resource for new grandparents to choose the perfect nickname for their grandchildren to call them by. A thousand name ideas for grandparents to choose from. Every grandparent will find their perfect name.

When you babysit a grandma, if you're lucky . . . it's a sleepover at her house! And with the useful tips found in this book, you're guaranteed to become an expert grandma-sitter in no time. (Be sure to check out the sections on: How to keep a grandma busy; Things to do at the park; Possible places to sleep, and what to do once you're both snugly tucked in for the night.) From the author-illustrator team behind the bestselling How to Babysit a Grandpa comes a funny and heartwarming celebration of grandmas and grandchildren. This Read & Listen edition contains audio narration.

Read along in this heartwarming and whimsical celebration of the relationship between grandmothers and grandchildren, the special names we give them and the fun times we share that turn happy days into lasting memories. Written in rhyme, it is sure to delight young and old alike. The beautiful watercolour illustrations capture the fun and warmth of this special bond in an inclusive way.

The first six years of Helen Martin’s life, living on a Saskatchewan farm in the 1950s, were idyllic. But everything changed when her mother passed away. The sudden and inexplicable cruelty and neglect that Helen endured at the hands of her stepmother—a much younger woman her father married within months of being widowed—are the subject of this distressing, but ultimately triumphant, memoir: Don’t Ever Call Me Mother: Homeless in my Own Home. In a voice that is clear, courageous, guileless, honest, and hopeful, Helen captures the innocence and bewilderment of her childhood. She shares with readers the various ways in which she managed to cope and endure the terrible trauma of her youth. At the same time, Helen uses the pages of this memoir to pay homage to her Ukrainian culture and traditions. She especially highlights the few individuals who offered her kindness and support at a time when she was so often hungry, cold, lonely, bruised, and unwashed: her two older sisters, a couple of neighbours, and an elderly hobo who became her best friend. Such unexpected and enriching relationships make all the difference in a young life and are explored here with feeling. This beautiful memoir serves as both a testament to the author’s resilience and a reminder that childhood abuse of any kind must never be tolerated.