Bill Gates Personal Super Secret Private Laptop

The same team who brought you French for Cats and O.J's Legal Pad now exposes the hyperkinetic brain of the world's most famous billionaire - Microsoft cofounder Bill Gates. Relying on a hilarious blend of misrepresentation and outright fabrication, Bill Gates' Personal Super Secret Private Laptop employs the technique of Virtual Parody to penetrate the most paranoid computer company in history, and tap into Bill Gates' super-secret files. This amazing 'record' of Gates' innermost thoughts is presented in the form of an actual laptop computer, complete with a dandruff-littered and Coke-stained keyboard as well as screen after screen crammed with notes, charts, graphs and drawings. And on its hard drive, readers will get a glimpse into the warped genius of the nerdy, super-competitive Boy Scout who became the richest man in the world.

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As a serious player, a high handicapper, or simply a baffled onlooker to the awesome nonsense that is golf, have you ever wondered why, say, the golf balls have dimples, and the tee is both the thing you stick in the ground and the place you hit from, and the hole is so small, and the courses have all these big pits full of sand where any sane person would put grass? Well, so did noted humor writer and avid hacker Henry Beard, who brought twenty-first-century computer search-engine technology to bear on this thousand-year-old game, tapping the internet's inherent capacity to confer a thin veneer of authenticity to far-fetched accounts of great moments in the history of golf, warped portraits of its legendary players, and fanciful conjectures about its origins and evolution. Employing an easy-to-read and simple-to-fudge timeline format, he chronicles the amazing process through which this screwy pastime with wacky equipment and loony rules played for penny wagers by a bunch of bored-silly shepherds was gradually transformed into a screwy sport with wacky equipment and loony rules played for million-dollar purses by superstar athletes. As he peers through the mists of time to the birthplace of the game, Beard resolves once and for all its many mysteries, like where those weird-looking pants came from, when the fi rst telling of the "Hit, drag Harry" joke was, what a Stimpmeter is, and who dreamed up the idea of those stupid blimps. Here, then, in one convenient golf-bag-side-pocket-sized volume is a rich, wildly embroidered, ludicrously embellished tapestry of colorful fabrications and highly entertaining but thoroughly dubious speculations that tell the tall tale of golf -- the game that deranged the world.

Presents a biography of the founder of Microsoft and discusses his role in the transformation of the computer industry and his charitable work as one of the world's richest people.

Profiles the computer guru who founded the company responsible for the MS-DOS and Windows operating systems.