Table For Two Mr Sparrowhawk

Imagine going on a luxury cruise holiday around South America where your fellow passengers turn out to be a beautiful blonde ex-Miss World from Switzerland, a ventriloquist’s dummy, an Italian mobster and his wife, a Blackpool Landlady, a 1960s Beat Combo, Sea Legs & Co – a troupe of sexy girl dancers, an eccentric Lord, four undercover cops, a suitcase full of guns and a seven foot tall angry Scottish chef. What could possibly go wrong? If diamonds are a girl’s best friend, why does Susan think Fanny has a screw loose? Why do Big Sharon and Randy Mandy have it in for Steve? What does our hero conceal under Doris Downing’s blue rinse syrup at the Disco? Is professional dance host Vlad “Terry” Rasputin really a Russian, or is he actually from Preston? Why was that man wearing a thong in the ballroom? Will the Talent Show ever be the same again? Totti is a super sexy Italian lady dripping with diamonds. Carlo and Mario wear shiny silk suits and have thin ankles. Danny is an enigma and Lord Toucan wears a top hat and tails every day. But which one of them has a big secret connected to the Royal Gilbert Hall? Follow Steve Sparrowhawk’s hilarious daily adventures, mishaps, romps and japes on board the ship as he leaves a trail of chaos and destruction in his wake. Will he succumb to the temptations of the flesh? Will he disembark the ship as a multi-millionaire? Will he survive the cruise? Will anyone care?

Dr Newton is now a senior ornithologist with the Natural Environment Research Council and the book draws on his wide knowledge of the Sparrowhawk, as well as that of other workers in Britain and abroad. The text gives a detailed account of all aspects of the Sparrowhawk's lifestyle, population levels and trends, and the impact of man and environment on the species in recent times. The book also has the benefit of Dr Newton's particular interest in population regulation and breeding performance, and in the remarkable contrast in size between the Sparrowhawk sexes (males being half the weight of females), which means that they diverge, almost as separate species, in habitat preference, diet and in response to circumstance. The narrative is fully supported by diagrams, tables and photographs, and is embellished by Keith Brockie's evocative and accomplished drawings.