Its Decorative Gourd Season Motherfuckers

A passionate and profane love letter to fall, the best fucking season of the year. Do you get excited at the first brisk breeze of the year? Are you overcome with delight when you see piles of red leaves? Do you lose your fucking mind at a pumpkin patch? At last, the epically funny internet sensation It's Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers is now a visual tour-de-force, teeming with a cornucopia of perfectly paired photos and seasonal enchantments to make it really fucking sing. Whiffy candles, wicker baskets, motherfucking gourd after gourd, and people going insane they love fall so much? Check! Also included: the equally lifechanging meditation It's Rotting Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers, because all good things must end. Give it to everyone you love, or put it on your fucking coffee table next to a pile of shellacked vegetables to really tie the room together. Perfect for: For anyone who fucking loves fall, and fans of McSweeney's, Go the Fuck to Sleep, Deep Thoughts, the Onion, and the New Yorker.

Featuring way too many forewords, including one by Jake Tapper It's a great undertaking to raise a humor website from infancy to full-fledged adulthood, but with the right editors, impeccable taste, and a dire political landscape, your site will enjoy years of relevance and comic validation. Join us as we revisit the first twenty-one years of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, from our bright-eyed and bewildered early stages to our world-weary and bewildered recent days. Keep Scrolling Till You Feel Something is a coming-of-age celebration of the pioneering website, featuring brand-new pieces and classics by some of today's best humor writers, like Ellie Kemper, Wendy Molyneux, Jesse Eisenberg, Tim Carvell, Karen Chee, Colin Nissan, Megan Amram, John Moe, and many more. Including: I Don't Hate Women Candidates--I Just Hated Hillary and Coincidentally I'm Starting to Hate Elizabeth Warren It's Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers On the Implausibility of the Death Star's Trash Compactor The Only Thing That Can Stop This Asteroid is Your Liberal Arts Degree If Women Wrote Men the Way Men Write Women My Coming Out Story, Sponsored by Bank of America I Regret to Inform You That My Wedding to Captain Von Trapp Has Been Canceled Please Forgive Us at Blue Apron for This Week's Meals. We've Been Having a Tough Time Lately

A collection of top-selected writings from the iconic Internet article site known for its humorous articles, unwavering Garamond font and abnormally narrow margins includes such entries as "I Regret to Inform You That My Wedding to Captain Von Trapp Has Been Canceled" and "Hamlet (Facebook News Feed Edition.)" 20,000 first printing.

The revolutionary literary vision that sowed the seeds of Objectivism, Ayn Rand's groundbreaking philosophy, and brought her immediate worldwide acclaim. This modern classic is the story of intransigent young architect Howard Roark, whose integrity was as unyielding as granite...of Dominique Francon, the exquisitely beautiful woman who loved Roark passionately, but married his worst enemy...and of the fanatic denunciation unleashed by an enraged society against a great creator. As fresh today as it was then, Rand’s provocative novel presents one of the most challenging ideas in all of fiction—that man’s ego is the fountainhead of human progress... “A writer of great power. She has a subtle and ingenious mind and the capacity of writing brilliantly, beautifully, bitterly...This is the only novel of ideas written by an American woman that I can recall.”—The New York Times

The Best of McSweeney's Volume 2 the second instalment of Dave Eggers's crash course in what McSweeney's is all about brings together more stories from the first ten issues of the magazine. Jonathan Ames, Judy Budnitz, Glen David Gold, Jonathan Lethem and A.M. Homes are amongst the writers spreading their wings in this fine collection and showing once more why McSweeney's is now a byword for brilliance, innovation and the unexpected.

McSweeney's columnist Kent Woodyard brings new life to the mnemonic memory devices of a bygone era, from creative reinterpretations of classic mnemonics to original creations of dubious usage. Paired with whimsical illustrations, this book is the perfect gift for the word wizards of the world, as well as collectors of useless pop-culture trivia.

McSweeney's 65: Plundered spans the Americas, from a bone-strewn Peruvian desert to inland South Texas, and considers the violence that shaped it. In fifteen bracing stories, the collection delves into extraction, exploitation, and, crucially, defiance. How does a community, an individual, resist the plundering of land and peoples? Guest-edited by acclaimed author Valeria Luiselli, with Heather Cleary, Issue 65 brings together stories of stolen artifacts and endless job searches, of nationality-themed amusement parks and cultish banana plantations. Including contributors from Brazil, Cuba, Bolivia, Mexico, Argentina, Ecuador, the United States, and more, Plundered is a panoramic portrait of a hemisphere on fire. Praise for McSweeney's Quarterly A key barometer of the literary climate.-The New York Times McSweeney's is so much more than a magazine; it's a vital part of our culture. -Geoff Dyer, McSweeney's contributor and author of Jeff in Venice, Death in Varanasi and Otherwise Known as the Human Condition

A man disappears. The woman who loves him is left scarred and haunted. In her fierce, one-of-a-kind debut, Rebecca Lindenberg tells the story—in verse—of her passionate relationship with Craig Arnold, a much-respected poet who disappeared in 2009 while hiking a volcano in Japan. Lindenberg’s billowing, I-contain-multitudes style lays bare the poet’s sadnesses, joys, and longings in poems that are lyric and narrative, at once plainspoken and musically elaborate. Regarding her role in Arnold’s story, Lindenberg writes with clear-eyed humility and endearing dignity: “The girl with the ink-stained teeth / knows she’s famous / in a tiny, tragic way. / She’s not / daft, after all.” And then later, playfully, of her travels in Italy with the poet, her lover: “The carabinieri / wanted to know if there were bears / in our part of America. Yes, we said, / many bears. Man-eating bears? Yes, of course, / many man-eating bears.” Every poem in this collection bursts with humor, pathos, verve—and an utterly unique, soulful voice. This widely anticipated debut, already selected as a finalist for several prominent book awards, marks the first collection in the newly minted McSweeney’s Poetry Series. MPS is an imprint which seeks to publish a broad range of excellent new poetry collections in exquisitely designed hardcovers—poetry that’s useful and meaningful to anyone in any walk of life.

Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known. Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge is packed with valuable information -- such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.