Gaslighted By God

“We have a right to encounter God where we are. We have a sacred responsibility to experience God authentically." What happens when the God we’ve been taught to believe in seems powerless to help us in the struggles of life? What do we do when the God we personally encounter no longer resembles the God we’ve been shown in narrow interpretations of the Bible? Many of those raised in the world of fundamentalist Christianity have been manipulated into accepting a false reality that runs counter to lived experience. The result is confusion, isolation, fear, shame, and trauma, often carried throughout one’s entire life. This book is for the victims of this spiritual abuse—anyone looking to reclaim their faith from legalism, nationalism, sexism, anxiety, intolerance, and other mechanisms of control utilized by God’s self-appointed gatekeepers. It’s for anyone who has learned that the real God is infinitely complex, that authentic faith is perfectly compatible with doubt, and that our suffering is not something we’ve earned. Gaslighted by God is not a book of easy answers—it’s a companion for those mourning the loss of a belief system who need their pain recognized and legitimized. Tiffany Yecke Brooks shows—through stories from her own life, conversations with Christians from a variety of backgrounds, historical anecdotes, and messy episodes from Scripture—that there can be faith after disillusionment. But it will be a different faith—bruised, battered, nuanced, and real, rather than one wrapped in tissue-thin platitudes and three-point sermons. It will be a faith empowered to see beyond who God “should” be to who God is.

"Gaslighting" is used to describe abusive behavior, specifically when an abuser manipulates information in such a way as to make a victim question his or her sanity. Gaslighting intentionally makes someone doubt their memories or perception of reality. The term Gaslighting originates in the systematic psychological manipulation of a victim by her husband in Patrick Hamilton's 1938 stage play Gaslight, and the film adaptations released in 1940 and 1944. In the story, the husband attempts to convince his wife and others that she is insane by manipulating small elements of their environment and insisting that she is mistaken, remembering things incorrectly, or delusional when she points out these changes. The play's title alludes to how the abusive husband slowly dims the gas lights in their home, while pretending nothing has changed, in an effort to make his wife doubt her own perceptions. The wife repeatedly asks her husband to confirm her perceptions about the dimming lights, but in defiance of reality, he keeps insisting that the lights are the same and instead it is she who is going insane.

“Scary God brings you face-to-face with our Warrior-King God.” —John Bevere, bestselling author of The Bait of Satan Discover the great wonder and wild freedom the fear of the Lord can bring. God’s character is like a mighty diamond—a glorious convergence of respect, awe, reverence, adoration, thanksgiving, and yes, fear. Yet why is it so difficult to reconcile the wrath of God with the love of God? As Mattie teaches, it is simply a continual awareness of Jesus, our mighty Warrior King. We should not be afraid to come to God; rather we should be afraid to be against Him. Fans of Jefferson Bethke, John Bevere, and Brian Head Welch, will love the straight-talk in Scary God.

Why would a perfectly good and loving God consign anyone to eternal suffering in hell? In Sinners in the Presence of a Loving God, R. Zachary Manis examines in detail the various facets of the problem of hell, considers the reasons why the usual responses to the problem are unsatisfying, and suggests how an adequate solution to the problem can be constructed. Historically, there are four standard explanations of the nature and purpose of hell: traditionalism, annihilationism, the choice model, and universalism. In Manis's assessment, all are deficient in some crucial respect. The alternative view that he develops and defends, the divine presence model, stands within the tradition that understands hell to be a state of eternal conscious suffering, but, Manis contends, avoids the worst problems of its competitors. The key idea is that the suffering of hell is not the result of a divine act that aims to inflict it, but rather is the way in which a sinful creature necessarily experiences the unmitigated presence of a holy God. Heaven and hell are not two "places" to which the saved and damned are consigned, respectively, but rather are two radically different ways in which different persons will experience the same reality of God's omnipresence once the barrier of divine hiddenness is finally removed.

In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works, how you can decide which relationships can be saved and which you have to walk away from—and how to gasproof your life so you'll avoid gaslighting relationship. Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time. Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back, you wonder if your mother is right and figure that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism. If you think things like this can’t happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. Are you being gaslighted? Check for these telltale signs: 1) Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse? 2) When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world? 3) Do you dread having small things go wrong at home—buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar? 4) Do you have trouble making simple decisions and constantly second guess yourself? 5) Do you frequently make excuses for your partner's behavior to your family and friends? 6) Do you feel hopeless and joyless?

A groundbreaking book on the true nature of faith deconstruction Alisa and Tim help the reader to deconstruct the deconstructionists and thus to respond to them, both with arguments and with love and sensitivity. This is a timely book! -- Carl Trueman, author of The Rise and Triumph of the Modern Self A movement called ‘deconstruction’ is sweeping through our churches and it is affecting our loved ones. It has disrupted, dismantled, and destroyed the faith of so many, and this book can help you not only understand what’s happening but also stand your ground and respond with clarity and confidence. Maybe you have a loved one who is deconstructing their faith, and you are struggling to know how to respond; Maybe you are trying to understand the radical spiritual makeover your friend or family member is going through; Maybe your relationship with a loved one has been strained or even cut off because of your “toxic” Christian beliefs and you don’t know what to do; Maybe you’re experiencing doubt yourself and facing hard questions about truth, God, the Bible, theology and the gospel. Some who leave the faith feel wounded by the church. Others feel repressed by some of the moral imperatives found in Scripture. For some, it leads to a custom-made spirituality. For others, deconstructing their faith leads them away from the truth into agnosticism, atheism, the occult, or humanism. In this seminal book, Alisa Childers, author of Another Gospel?, and Tim Barnett, creator of Red Pen Logic, will help you understand what deconstruction is, where it comes from, why it is compelling to some, and how it disorients the lives of so many. You will be able to think through the main issues around faith deconstruction and explore wise and loving ways to respond from a biblical worldview.

Biblical view of suffering Personal account of God using suffering for His blessing Inspirational story of God at work

When anyone acts in accordance with the devil, they become of a “devilish quality,” (John 6:70). When Christians are enticed by the devil, they are pulled away from God by honors, profits, pleasures, or whatever other things the devil uses to hinder their profiting by the Word, (Luke 8:12). These wicked spirits have such a heinous effect on the world, that the same condemnation that will befall them, will befall those who follow them. The proud fall into the condemnation of the devil, that is, by means of pride and high mindedness they too will be cast into hell fire, in the same manner as the devil will be. In consideration of such vile and wicked practices following the devil and his practices, Gifford directs the reader to resist such assaults and submit before God with the weapon of steadfast faith. His text is a famous one, “Be sober and watch: for your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: whom resist steadfast in the faith,” (1 Peter 5:8-9). Gifford expounds on how the Apostle Peter, 1) begins with an admonition or exhortation by which he stirs up all the faithful to sobriety and watchfulness with these words, “Be sober and watch,” 2) why it is important to move all men into this position of sobriety and watchfulness, seeing they have such a terrible and cruel adversary who continually seeks their eternal misery and destruction, “For your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” And, 3) teaching how Christians shall withstand him, overcome him, and put him to flight, that so they may escape from his cruel tyranny, “Whom resist steadfast in the faith.” This is an exceedingly helpful work, that will arm the Christian in due manner to fight steadfastly in the power of Jesus Christ through his Spirit against the works and wiles of the devil. And Gifford will not only show how to do this, but how to do it effectively, with victory, through true Christian faith empowered by God’s Christ.

For many of us, the question of whether or not God exists is one of the most perplexing and profound questions of our lives, and numerous philosophers and theologians have debated it for centuries. Laura Ekstrom here takes a new look at the issue of God's existence by examining it against the reality of human suffering, bringing to the fore contentious presuppositions concerning agency and value at the core of the matter. When we survey the world, we observe an enormous amount of pain, including virtually unspeakable kinds of maltreatment and agony, many instances of which seem patently unfair, unearned, and pointless. This book argues that, in light of these observations, it is reasonable to conclude that God does not exist. The book unravels the extent and power of arguments from evil. Ekstrom provides a close investigation of a largely overlooked claim at the heart of major free-will-based responses to such arguments, namely that free will is worth it: sufficiently valuable to serve as the good that provides a God-justifying reason for permitting evil in the world. Through fresh examinations of traditional theodicies, Ekstrom develops an alternative line called divine intimacy theodicy, and makes an extended case for rejecting skeptical theism. The book takes up an argument from evil concerning a traditional doctrine of hell, which reveals a number of compelling issues concerning fault, agency, and blameworthiness. In response to recent work contending that the problem of evil is toothless because God is indifferent to human beings, Ekstrom defends the essential perfect moral goodness of God. She further tackles the question of whether or not it is possible to live a religious life as an agnostic or as an atheist. Through rigorous reflection, with deep respect for religious thought and experience, and with sensitivity to the range and kinds of suffering so many endure, Ekstrom firmly advances discussion of the problem of evil and paves the way for further scholarship in the philosophy of religion.

If you are doing all of the talking, it is likely that you will not hear what others have to say, let alone gain from their counsel, insight and wisdom—if this is true with humans, isn’t it even more so with God? It is difficult sometimes, in our era of financial collapse, ongoing war and increasing alienation from each other, to feel confident that the Almighty takes a personal interest in our lives. Knowing God’s Voice is the assurance so many people are waiting for: God is interested. He has a lot to say! Readers will learn to discern God’s voice from the background noise of internal anxiety and external circumstances, and to trust His guidance and revelation even in trying times. God is speaking to His people, if only they will have ears to hear!